Our Greatest Fear

It started as a thought, just a whisper, a hint of an idea. But this was no ordinary idea. It was big, bold and scary as hell. The concept was fun and exciting, a risky business! And therefore, almost immediately dismissed. “Just who do you think you are to…” my inner voice scoffed at me. “You don’t know what you’re doing,” she continued, “It’ll never work!”

Sound familiar? How often we talk ourselves out of an idea long before it can grow into a full-fledged plan. We play it safe. We bury our dreams so deep, we forget they were ever ours. We make excuses so reasonable, we begin to believe them ourselves. We do not reject our dreams kindly, gently or nicely.

Every time we dismiss an idea, a little piece of our soul withers. And it does not feel good.

So, we blame. We blame lack of time and money. We blame our age. We blame everything except our fear. No one wants to be called a coward. I mean, really, do we ever have enough time or money to make our dreams come alive? After all, I’m not being fearful – I’m being practical! And when the story isn’t enough to quiet our minds, we distract ourselves.

We distract ourselves with busy-ness. Amazing how productive we can be when we are avoiding our soul’s longing. Or not, as we binge watch Netflix or play games on our phones. We watch countless videos of funny people and silly animals. As we try to numb and dumb ourselves, our dreams continue to percolate. They simmer and wait, or they nag and poke at us. It gets a little more persistent, a little louder. “Wouldn’t this be exciting?” it says. “Come on, won’t you at least try?” We can continue to ignore it or choose to take a step toward our dreams. It’s always a choice.

It is time to choose. Do you keep on doing what you’re doing, or take a chance on change?

Leap and the net will appear! That was the motto of my youth, but somewhere in the past several years I became afraid to hop, much less leap! My trust in myself was broken, and my faith that the universe would provide was shaky at best. I had traded excitement, joy and an interesting life for the illusion of safety and security. My predictable, safe life was beyond boring, all because I had become fearful of taking a step, or leap, towards my dreams. I can attest, this is no way to live. It was high time to reacquaint myself with my sense of adventure, excitement and fun, even if it meant taking risks.

We all fear risk. I think when we take a hard look at the things we fear risking, we realize it is often complete rubbish and nonsense. We are afraid of risking our heart in love again. We are afraid of appearing foolish. We are afraid of losing what we worked so hard to achieve. We fear losing control. These fears and delusions are of our own making. It is our lack of trust and faith, in ourselves and the universe to provide for us, that fuels our fear. If we never risk, we never grow.

When we operate from a place of fear, risk becomes self-fulling. Yet, when we live with trust and faith, the net is guaranteed to appear, no matter whether we step, hop or leap. You cannot be in fear and faith at the same time.

So, what does trust and faith mean to you? What do you believe? We all believe in something. Define it. Live it. Have faith in it, and trust what you believe. Regardless of your beliefs, you will create your own reality. We all begin to believe our stories about ourselves, whether it is truth or wildest fiction.

Choose your words wisely because they will form your actions and outcomes.

I now choose to make my story one of conquering my fears, stretching my faith and humbly trusting my own gifts. Listening to my ideas with a sense of wonder and possibility, rather than fearfully dismissing them outright, and giving voice to anticipation rather than doubt, and curiosity over self-criticism.

The stories we tell ourselves have power and shape our lives accordingly. Now is time to silence the inner critic, naysayer and outright hateful commentary of our thoughts. We have enough fear, distrust and bitchiness in our outer world without allowing it free reign in our inner world. When we change our own inner world, we change the outer experience as well. Trust me, a risk worth taking.

Now is time to be brave. Risk shining your light, risk living boldly and trust…for we all have a job to do.

I have recently become reacquainted with this beautiful poem by Marianne Williamson from her book A Return to Love.  I suggest you read it slowly, devour and savor her truth.

Our Deepest Fear
By Marianne Williamson

Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. 
Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. 
It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us.

We ask ourselves
Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous?
Actually, who are you not to be? 
You are a child of God.

Your playing small does not serve the world. 
There's nothing enlightened about shrinking
So that other people won't feel insecure around you.

We are all meant to shine, as children do. 
We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us.

It's not just in some of us; 
It's in everyone.

And as we let our own light shine, 
We unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. 
As we're liberated from our own fear, 
Our presence automatically liberates others.